A New Shamanism

Spirit knows no time or place

besides everything, everything at once,

all life and all death at once,

all beauty and ugliness,

all passion and emptiness,

everything, everything at once.

Everything that has or ever shall have

spirit are now alive, forever.

It is but a little thing

to slip into this vast river’s flow, visiting

sorrows past and future

to breathe comfort and love

as the spirit guide you are and were and will always be.

Reaching back

to your pain-struck child self, or youth, or adult, whisper:

You’re not alone. You are loved. You are infinite

and wondrous and perfect.

I will come when you need me.

Keep your promise. Face the pain. Visit

until you remember

how a spirit of light came

when you needed her.


Human Effort

There are days when you try to be an amazing person

and days when you just try to be a person

at all, still breathing, holding on.

This is the face of someone expertly trying only to breathe

— you probably can’t see it in her eyes,

which is why all judging is but a waste of time.

This is a plea for compassion

for everyone struggling to exist.





Life; Death

Disaster days keep us alive.

We eat the dead. We burn the dead

and build from the dead, a fate

no cry of compassion can quit.

Disaster is the elixir of life, bringing

us to boil with adrenaline

until we feel on fire, so alive.

Complete peace only stagnates, dulls and deadens

as cunningly as poison,

and small sips make us all think we’re immune

but real salvation lies

in the terror of existence, where we live

just atoms away from death, always.

Here, there’s nothing to do but dance

between every breath

that could be our last.

Anything could happen.

It’s the disaster days that throw

us onward through time; it’s death

that gives us life until we die.


Being a Shaman

I am a spirit-seer; I cross between realities to learn the unknowable and befriend wondrous beings, for even the most powerful benefit from my humble blessings. I transcend time and space to see that which cannot be seen, and find my way through the darkest of places. I dance between contradictions and surrender myself to paradoxes. I know the physical and the imaginary are of equal value. I commune with the universe and feel the infinite connections running through it.

I am everything and nothing; simultaneously infinitely meaningful and infinitely meaningless. I give and take; I bless and am blessed. And in the end I am simply human, trying to live up to my potential.

jove and tree

My Cosmology: Spiritual and Physical Realities

The entire scope of what we call knowledge is nothing more or less than what we experience and what we imagine.

I believe that spirit is pure potential, as spirit is inherently non-physical, and the only thing that cannot physically exist is potential. I also believe that our imaginations are our sixth sense: a direct sense of potential, and therefore a direct sense of the spirit world (albeit not a complete, innate understanding of the spirit world).

In energetic terms, the spirit world is equivalent to potential energy, whereas the physical world is equivalent to kinetic energy. In the spirit world, there are no limits such as exist in physicality. Time and space exist infinitely and simultaneously. I believe that potential itself is likewise infinite, insofar as there is some possibility for everything imaginable to happen or exist. Meanwhile the physical world is an instance of some set of potentials manifesting as a reality that is limited by the myriad variables put in place starting when this universe began. It is possible that all potentials do manifest in alternate universes; I have a feeling that this is the case. However, the difference is still that the spirit world is completely without limit and since all things exist in potential simultaneously, nothing ever actually changes there. The spirit world has all the wisdom and timeless perspective possible, meanwhile the physical world is where real change and growth can happen.

The spirit world and the physical world, potential and actuality, need each other and dream each other into existence.

I said above that the spirit world is closely tied to the imagination – but this is not at all to say that spirit is any less real. Spirit by definition does not physically exist; but neither does potential energy. Our imagination is our best source of information about non-physical things. Stop denigrating the imagination as if non-physical things that we dream or otherwise sense are less valid than non-physical things that are not contained in our imagination. People often say, “I didn’t imagine it!” when talking about non-physical things, which is something of a confusion. What people seem to mean is that the non-physical event had a certain physicality about it, which made the incident feel more “real” than otherwise. But that is like saying a body of water had a certain fire-ness about it, and that fire is more real than water, so the “fire-like” water is also more real. They are just different.

Both the physical and the non-physical are real, end of story. In which case we can begin to use our imagination as a true sixth sense and brilliant tool to learn about the spirit world. Shamanic journeys, for instance, may in fact take place entirely in the imagination, and many traditional shamans remark that this is of no consequence whatsoever.

When our imagination can be embraced rather than exiled, so many difficulties in getting to know spirit fall away. We can stop worrying about what is real and what isn’t (a useless question anyway, since as I said, the entire scope of what we call knowledge is nothing more or less than what we experience and what we imagine). We can journey deeper and more wildly and easier than ever before.

More Truth, Less Metaphor

I have carried infants in my womb.

I have given birth,

but not by choice. I was a mother,

strong as a dandelion

gone to seed

who bows to the wind and lets loose

her offspring to fly,

without thought of her own will.

Some seeds dry out or rot or are eaten;

some take root, out of her sight and touch.

Mother dandelion can only ride the seasons,

blooming, seeding,

and does not grieve the irretrievable

or hate the wind

or wish she were something

other than herself.





Healing Dolls

In my work as a shamanic practitioner, reuniting people with lost soul parts and sometimes getting messages from the spirits of departed loved ones, I have found it useful to make dolls that represent these spirits when one is trying to connect with them and honour them. For me, these baby doll bundles are very special and healing.  I am able to cherish the connection with my inner children spirits, and they help the grieving process concerning the loss of children I have mothered.

See them on Etsy.


Blessing Bottle

I made a rawhide “bottle” with an antler and quartz stopper attached with chain, and decorated with little charms. Inside, it is filled with a mix of herbs and wildflower seeds to be sprinkled on the Earth as a blessing, whenever I feel moved to do so.

I can custom-create these on my Etsy if anyone is interested!

Blessing Pouch on Etsy



Crafts! Rattle and Bag

I’ve been crafting a lot recently, making some items that are very special to me. We were gifted with feet from a great horned owl that had been found dead at the side of the road, and after putting them in Borax for about two years, they were beautifully preserved. I made a rawhide rattle and placed it in the owl’s talons, and the result is very powerful to me.

I also made a neat little carrying case for the four elements, with tiny bottles inside holding objects representing them. It’s adorned with a fox face pelt, a compass, and other charms.

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Being Raw

Today I feel raw, all veneer cut to the quick, exposing nerves.

I remember being 13, obsessed with The Shawshank Redemption, the story of an innocent man in prison. He was described as having an “invisible coat” that shielded him from the horrors around him, protecting something within him so that it could never be touched.

I remember being 14, writing tomes about ancient Roman stoicism, because it let me emotionless and strong, untouchable.

I was 15 and writing quotes on the wall to let my family know they couldn’t break me.

I don’t know where I got this attitude of strength from, but it’s what saved me. No matter what was done to me, no matter what they made me do, they couldn’t get to my soul. I knew right from wrong and they couldn’t corrupt that.

Now I have peace, and beautiful people around me who amaze me with their kindness. Now it is time to do the good that I knew all along was right.