I have the most supportive partner possible — she is willing to “do therapy” 24 hours a day, even though she herself has poor health and is disabled. She takes care of me in a multitude of ways.

I understand that dealing with the emotional part of healing is hard for her. Emotions aren’t really her thing, and I don’t want to put more on her plate by demanding that she makes a super-human effort for me.

So, to put it simply, I cry alone. Not often, but I will sneak off to the bedroom and curl up when I need to, and let the emotions out. Usually only if my whole body is screaming to cry, not just my emotions. When I can no longer hold it in.

I used to have the sweetest cats. My orange tabby in particular would cuddle forever. He’s the type of cat to actually give even more love than he gets in return. He hugs with his paws. I used to lie down with him and cry, and he would somehow make it better.

But I had to give him to friends who live far away when we moved. I can’t have cats here, and I don’t know when I’ll be in a pet-friendly situation. My living situation is less than ideal…actually, it’s pretty difficult. (I do have dwarf hamsters, but…they just run around and eat, not being sensitive to emotions.)

I really, really miss my cat.

I need to figure out something equally comforting when I’m upset, because crying alone is kind of awful…but I have very few options. I never use the phone, for instance. I don’t have real-life friends around.

So I’m wondering, what do YOU do, when you’re upset?


One thought on “Self-Care

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